THE GREATEST SONIC THE HEDGEHOG STORY EVER TOLD
by Camels are AWESOME
Summary: No, SRSLY. I have never read over a more elegant and masterful piece of fanfiction. Summary: Every1 hates Shadow, and he's just oblivious to it... One day he makes a phone call to Eggman, upsetting him, DUN DUN DUN. & knuxrouge. NO FLAMES.


Sonic: "man shadowz so freekin stupid man."

Knuckles: "man I know like. Like, I think we should go kill him like." (Knuckles is Irish like)

Since the beginning of time everyone has known that Shadow sucks. So peoples, you're going to be VERY happy after reading this, for this is the story of his death.

Sooozz 1 day the eggman wuz sitting in his robotic egg shaped thing that he uses 2 fly around or just get around in general cuz u see hes 2 fat to walk himself – hiz legz cant carry hiz weight. He was sitting mindin his own business lissinin 2 his favorite song on his Zune (the 1 that goes like: _I am the Eggman, I've got the master plan_.) when all of a sudden he's just RUDELY interrupted by a phone call from Shadow. Ugh. I know, shadowz nearly as annoying as Kara Dioguardi, but we all know that it's not possible for anyone else to be THAT annoying. Annoyed, and rightfully so, da eggman picks up da fone and yells: "VAT DO YOU VANT???"

Shadow replies with a 'I promise you, REVENGE!' as if he's bein held in a mental institute, and dis makez da eggman mad.

"OHMYGOODNESSTWESNFJEWW YOU STOOPIIIIDD PIECE OF POO."

"PLAYTIME IS OVER!" Shadow screamz.

"NO! VAT IS IT! IVE HADZ ENUFF." the Eggman screamz. The Eggman then proceeds to SLAM the phone back into its receiver.

Meanwhile, wherever Shadow is…

"DEATH TO ALL THAT HANG UP ON ME! I will now KILL Eggman!!!" SOoooozz shadow runz off to find da eggman when he bumpz in2 Knucklez who wuz sittin on a tree. (LULZ I KNOWZ DAT MAKEZ NO SENCE)

"HOW DARE YOU STAND IN MY WAY." Shadow screeches.

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SHOULD WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, MORON!" Knucklez repliez.

"NO NO NO NO. YOUZ IMBECILE DARE SPEAK TO I, THE GREAT SHADOW, IN SUCH A MANNER???" Shadowz repliez.

"you knowz whatz??? I am now going to do the world a favor and kill youz cuz you're so embarrassing and corny. You completely ruined the sonic the hedgehog franchize!" Knucklez repliez.

Rouge thenz appearz.

A few seconds later, she disappearz.

Then, a few more seconds later, she again reappearz.

(LOLWUT)

"WHATZ IS THIZ??? NOW YOU TOO R GOIN 2 DYE 2 U STOOPID BAT!" Shadowz states matter of factly.

"I won't lose to the likes of you!" Rouge retorts, puffing out her chest and placing her handz on her hipz. She then leans over and slapz him shaRPly across the face, killing him. "HA! I win, as usual."

"NO, THAT WAS MY JOB!" Knucklez screamz angrily. Rouge then pats him on the head:

"So cute." She sayz.

Sonic thenz appearz.

"HEY GUYS --- OH MY GOSH!!! SHADOW!!! YOU – YOU KILLED HIM!" Sonic's eyes begin to water. "You… _Killed him_. After all those years of knowing him, for who he really is, the banters, the fights, all of the memories… HOW COULD YOU??!?!?!?!?!" He then shootz daggerz at Rouge.

"SONIC! I – I didn't know that you were going to know you know? I – I didn't mean to! It's just that he threatened to kill _me_!"

"WAIT!" Knuckles screamz. "HOW DID YOU KNOW THAT SHEZ THE ONE WHO KILLED HIM ANYWAY???"

"THE MARK LEFT ON HIS FACE AFTER SHE SLAPPED HIM, YOU IDIOT! WHY, ROUGE, I OUGHTTA JUS' KILL YOU!!! YOU _KNOW _HOW MUCH **I'VE **WANTED TO KILL HIM, AND THEN YOU JUST COMPLETELY DISREGARD ME AND KILL HIM YOURSELF???" Sonic then wipez the tears from his eyes, trying to push out of his mind the sad thought that he'll never be able to be the one that killed him, and lunges towards Rouge.

"Ah!" Rouge blocked herself, and tensed, ready to be killed, when Knuckles intervened.

"HEY YOU DON'T TOUCH HER SONIC! HE'S DEAD ALRIGHT??? WHAT MORE DO WE NEED??? JUST GET OVER YOURSELF! SHE DID A BETTER JOB OF IT THAN YOU EVER WOULD'VE."

"ah, well, ur probly rite." Sonic admitted. "I'll just go to sleep now."

Then, at that moment, an overwhelming rush of joy swept past all of them: Shadow is dead. SHADOW IS DEAD. _**SHADOW IS DEAD!!!**_

Rouge and Knuckles' eyes met, both watery and filled with sparkly happiness.

"I love you cuddles." She said softly.

"Me too Rouge."

**THE END!**

OHZZ AND BYZ ZE WAY, IF ZAT IDIOT (and we all know who I'm talking about) REVIEWS ZHIZ, LET HIM KNOWZ ZAT HE WON'T BE HAVING AN ABUSE-FREE DAY!


End file.
